Positive Thinking

This post is going to be a little different, and possibly more rambly than my other posts. So if you’re ready for a long read, let’s get into it.

When people describe me (or my blog), the word positive comes out a lot. I can’t deny it. I’m a positive person, an eternal optimist, and always looking on the bright side. I even have a certificate from my work’s latest Christmas party to prove it.

wonder woman award

One day, while I was lost in my thoughts, I started trying to dissect my way of thinking. About why I always assume things will be okay, and have a positive outlook. This led to thinking about nature vs nurture. I had a normal, happy childhood. My parents are still together after almost 30 years, and I get along with my siblings really well. We’re a fairly close-knit family. I had a small group of friends growing up, and never really lost any friendships due to anything bad. Just growing apart. I was encouraged and loved, and was fairly successful at things I set my mind too. All of these add up to one positive Angela.

angela 12

It wasn’t till the last year of high school and uni where I started getting more anxious thoughts. I think all teenagers have to go through this. No matter how happy and well-adjusted you are. Some will get it worse, but it is something you get through. The first time I failed a test, I was gobsmacked. I always did well in school, and this threw me. After some crying, I pulled it together and redid the test. This time I passed. Not a great grade, but it was a pass.

evening walk

In university, the workload was a lot more intense than high school. Giant essays, exams, group assignments, and all that were piled into smaller amounts of time. Rather than having a year to focus on the subject, you had a few months.

I remember once being in town, and I was thinking about assignments coming up. My vision started getting fuzzy and black around the edges. Tunnel vision pretty much. This faded in and out, along with what I was hearing. I started blinking lots to try get rid of what was going on. For the next 30 seconds or so, everything would feel ‘off’. I was looking around, but it would take a second for my eyes to focus and adjust on what I was seeing. Like what I was seeing didn’t feel ‘real’. Then, suddenly everything would snap back to normal. Anyone ever experience something like that? This happened a few more times during uni and afterwards. I haven’t had it happen in a few years though. But it always freaked me out. I considered it to be a very mild version of a panic attack.

In the end though, I was able to push through my worries, keep studying, hanging out with loved ones, and come out with fairly good grades. Then came jobs.

uni 04

My first full time job was the worst one I’ve ever had. Helping arrange student loans via a helpline. Some people are rude to your face, but so many people are rude over the phone. It’s the actual worst. It was during this job that I started developing a different mentality. I stopped caring. After enough people shouting at you, calling you names, threatening to talk to the ‘media’, or just swearing at you, you stop caring. Which sucks, as I wanted to help people out. But it wore me down, and after a while, I was just another person who hated their job. It’s probably the only time I completely lost my positive outlook. I was grumpy, surly, and then sad. So I began looking for another job, eventually something came up, and I practically ran out the door. Soon enough, my positive mindset crept back in.

gardens 11

After some time back at university, studying something I was excited about, I scored a job at a daycare in town. My current job, which I’ve now had for almost three years. I’ve had many parents say “I don’t know how you do this job”. Handling nine babies and toddlers on a daily basis, 5 days a week. For the most part, it’s fun! Sometimes it can get a little crazy. But I’ve been in this job long enough, and had enough experience, that I can handle anything and everything these tiny children try to throw at me. I also have the support of a great team and manager. I feel like I’m in the job I’ve always meant to be in. Sure I have days where I feel tired, and I don’t want to go to work. But I’m honestly so happy in my job.

tarte makeup

What’s the point to all of these rambles? I’m honestly not sure. I just wanted to give an insight to how I currently think. So, how does one keep a positive mindset?

Is it just natural for some people to be more positive than others? Or do you have to build up and nurture that mindset? For me, I feel like it was a bit of a both. To end this very long post, here are some things to give your optimism a boost.

  • Learn from experience
  • Know that you can get through this, day by day, minute by minute, you’ll get through it
  • Keep a gratitude journal
  • List things that make you happy
  • Search up cute and inspiring quotes on Pinterest
  • Go outside and take a deep breath of fresh air

Nothing groundbreaking here. But all these things do help, must be why everyone recommends them right? You just need to figure out what’s a happy trigger for yourself.

What about you guys? Are you an optimist, or more of a realist? Somewhere in between? I’m curious.

Angela.

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Hello internet! My name is Angela. I write daily about my travels, life, thoughts, and ramblings. I live down in New Zealand with my lovely husband, Rory. Thanks for stopping by!
42 comments
  1. Thanks this is interesting. I like to think I’m a positive person but I have been struggling with anxiety. I guess your post shows you can go through bad patches but still overall remain positive.

  2. You are lucky to have Rory. I’m much older and not found anyone to put up with me …oops that is me sounding negative. Ok positive … I get to go to my parents every Christmas as knowing to take turns visiting parents with and one day….

    1. Anxiety does have a way of always creeping back in. But for me, being positive is something I like to keep focusing on. Sounds like it is for you too! I am very lucky to have found Rory, but as long as you have a good support system of loved ones (friends or family, online or in real life) then it’s another good step to help keep those positive thoughts coming 😀

  3. Having a job you love makes such a difference! I’m glad you got out of that helpline job, nobody is happy when people are rude to you all day. I worked retail for a few years and you really do stop caring about helping people after a while, it’s sad but true. Thank goodness I got out too ?

    1. It really does! Especially when you work full time, as you just spend so much time there. I’m glad you got out of that retail job too! I always make sure to be kind to those who work in customer service, as some people can just be so rude and there’s no reason to be!

      1. Yeah, a lot of people spend just as much time at their jobs as they do at home! I think working those jobs makes you more compassionate towards people who work in the service industry.

  4. Really enjoyed this. I agree I don’t know how you work with children. I spent over a year and a half working with 3-11 year olds and hated every minute. I guess it doesn’t help that in the UK you get paid peanuts to work with children and they’re usually badly behaved? Work plays a big part in happiness, so does having people you love around you? x

    1. Thanks Dannii! Haha, I work with really young kids. Under 5s. I dont think i could cope with middle school age. They really do start misbehaving then ?

  5. Being positive for me is a conscious decision to safeguard my joy from any negative influences. This is a process so I have to do this daily because things happen. I take pleasure in the small and big things that make my life better. I give thanks and genuinely appreciate all of the people who have been a blessing to me. Ultimately, to be positive is to trust and believe in something greater than yourself in spite of all the chaos going on around you. Lovely post, thanks for sharing. 🙂

    1. Thanks Cherylene! I agree with you. It’s also a conscious decision, to choose to focus on the positive. To find joys in both the small and big things ?

      1. Exactly! ?

  6. I think that when you have a support group, it is must easier to look at the bright side. And it’s nice that your co-workers are so kind to you and consider you a valuable asset because not many employers think that way or they don’t care. That’s why I left my last job at Macy’s, but I had to quit the new job after finding out I was pregnant lol. Been at home ever since and I cannot wait to get back to work, but, gotta find a suitable place for my munchkin because I trust no one lol.
    Anyway, nice of you to share a little insight of your life with us. I’m a natural worrier and literally blow things out of proportion sometimes, but that’s usually the case when I don’t fully understand the situation at hand lol. Doesn’t help that anxiety likes to creep up on me when I least expect it…Luckily, Alex is my rock, he helps keeping me grounded. It can be hard to be optimistic and positive when times are dire, but I can’t help but feel that that’s when your resolve get tested the most. And the way you handle things can have a lasting effect on you, so the more positive minded you are, the better you become at remaining calm when you need to be. Kind of like “practice makes perfect”.
    My life was never easy, not even during my childhood, so I tend to be more negative and harder on myself, only when it comes to myself, but when I look at other people’s situations, I feel much more positive for them. Possibly one of my greatest strengths is lifting people up, so I guess one of the things I have to work on is “practicing what I preach” lol.

    1. Its funny how that mindset works. We can be a lot harder on ourselves, but if someone else is down, we do our best to support, encourage and lifting them up. Its a hard habit to break and it would take lots of practice and experience. It’s so good when you habe a support group or person to rely on when things get too much though. I’m glad you have someone like Alex to be your rock ?
      Thanks for sharing your comment Rossy! ?

      1. Yes very true. And I’m glad to have him by side. ❤?

  7. I loved reading this post and finding more out about you. I can relate to the description where you blur out for a moment. I think when working in retail, I learnt worry so much. Some customers are just so rude and for no good reason right!
    It’s great you love your job now though. 🙂

    1. Thanks Laura ?
      It’s such a weird feeling when everything just goes out of focus for a bit. It’s like it gets too much so your brain just puts everything on low for a minute. Retail is one of the hardest jobs out there ?

  8. Thank you for sharing your experiences (: it really makes all the difference to know someone has dealt with the same things! Appreciate your tips at the end too xoxo

    1. I’m glad you can relate! Thanks Shannon ?

  9. I can really relate to this post!! One of my friends insists on calling me the most positive out of our friend group all the time and sometimes like you said i wonder if it has something to do with my home life. My parents have been together for nearly 20 years and are very supportive of me and I feel like if your home life is positive it will help you be more positive ? xx

    1. I’m glad you can relate Amelia!! That’s what I was wondering as well. Having a really good home life definitely helps to support your positive mindset 😀

      1. Yeah it definitely does ? xx

  10. Such a wonderful and insightful post Angela! Well done for going through difficulties and finding your way back to having a positive outlook. I would definitely say that I am between an optimist and a pessimist – I try my best to be positive in every situation, but it sort of runs in our family to have the occasional existential crisis :’) Thank you for sharing! Xx

    1. Thank you Maria! I’m happy to get back to my positive outlook. My family tends to go back and forth between optimism and realism, but I seem to mostly be positive! It’s funny how our families can influence this 🙂

  11. I love this different kind of post from you. I think I’m definitely more realistic than optimistic. I feel like I could be very pessimistic, though, because every bad think that could have happened to me in the last 26 years did actually happen, or most of them anyway. Fun thing is, my mother didn’t have an easy life but she’s the most optimistic person I know. She never questions that we’re going to have a “great year” that things will be okay. She’s extremely confident too. I wish I could be more like here. I try to be optimistic but I’m definitely the kind of “that’s too good to be true, not happening, person”.

    1. Thanks Chey! That’s really interesting about you and your mum. You both didn’t have easy lives, but you lean towards different ways of thinking. Over time people may change their way of thinking for a while, or something drastic happens to cause that change, but maybe it’s just how our brains are wired? I liked just letting my thoughts pour out in this post, it was kind of therapeutic 🙂

  12. I wish I had your optimism! I’m more of an anxious person, despite growing up in a stable family. And thanks for the tips at the end 🙂

    1. It really does depend on person to person! It’s been interesting hearing everyonea thoughts on the comment ?
      You’re welcome Nina, I hope they help ?

  13. Love these tips 🙂
    I’m currently reading/using the book ’52 lists for happiness’ and learning how much I love making lists – definitely a big help to stay positive and fulfilled.

    Thanks for sharing,

    Lianne
    https://liannemarissa.com

    1. Thanks Lianne! That book sounds really interesting! I’ll definitely look into it 🙂

  14. This post was totally intriguing! I was always an optimist until about a year ago, though that came more from the mindset of “I shouldn’t be upset/I’m not allowed to be upset or frustrated” than genuine optimism and I never realized the difference until last year. My husband is certainly a pessimist (though he would consider himself just a realist, lol), which has worn off on me unfortunately. Now I’m trying to find the silver lining more often because it’s definitely stressed me out way too much when I find myself looking at the worst. This is inspiring to be more positive!

    1. I’m glad you found it to be an interesting read Tialla! I’ve always seemed to err to being optimistic about everything rather than real. It has on few occasions backfired, but I just chalk it up to learning a lesson and move on. Focusing on the silver lining will hopefully help you find a middle ground between being positive and being a ‘realist’ haha! Thanks for reading!

  15. I love your posts and this one was not ramble-y at all! Positivity is definitely a choice. I have had periods in my life where it definitely hasn’t been easy, but since I tend to be a nurturer to not be positive is actually more detrimental to me mentally (if that makes sense) then not. I think we also need the bad times to appreciate the good ones And those good times or memories are what get us through. Huge hugs to you beauty <3

    1. Thank you Kate! <3
      It really is a choice to keep trying to think of the positive. It can be a balance though, as too much positivity can sometimes lead to naive or reckless thinking. It's a strange thing to balance, but as is life in general 🙂

      1. Hugs anytime sweets. It is so true. I always say life is about balance, but FINDING that is the difficult part lol. <3

  16. I’m glad I encountered your post. You have some great tips to keep up a positive outlook. I’m am in desperate need of some positivity and I’m gonna try some of the things you’ve mentioned like keeping a gratitude journal ?

    1. Thank you for reading! I’m glad you find my post helpful ?
      We all need some positivity every now and then. A gratitude journal is a nice way of keeping track of little things that made you happy ?

      1. Your post was really a factor on boosting up my mood. I was really down in the dumps these past few days.
        On a side note, I keep loads of pictures on my phone of things that make me happy that I can easily access when I’m sad; pictures of family, friends, my pet and things I enjoy doing. Though my issue was with family and friends this time, which backfired a bit on my mood ?
        Thanks again! I am already trying actually writing down things I’ grateful for ?

  17. Thanks for this post! It’s such a great read! I love how honest you are. I love writing similar posts to yours my most recent one is about being an over thinker but hopefully by writing down my thoughts I can help someone. https://somethingsotrue.com/2018/02/16/an-insight-to-an-overthinker-welcome-to-how-my-mind-works-?/ take a read if you have a few minutes ☺️? have. A great weekend! Sophie ?

    1. I’m glad you liked this post Sophie! It is nice to sometimes sit down and just let your thoughts pour out in a post. It’s therapeutic in a way 🙂
      I’d love to come over and check out your post too!

      1. I agree it’s completely therapeutic! You get more it then you would speaking to someone face to face! It’s great! ☺️ please do I’ll love to know what you think x

  18. So good- soooo interesting!

    1. Thank you ?

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